MEET PAUL KOWALSKI, AKA BLUNDERING PLUNDERING PAUL

Have you seen Paul? The neighborhood's new anarcho-libertarian. Paul fancies himself a cross between David Graeber and David Crockett: “two Davids, dig it?” as he would say. He loves wearing overalls like Dexy’s Midnight Runners and fashions himself a hardworking bloke, good with his hands. He has dreams about moving to the middle of nowhere and "living off the land” one day, but settler that he is, none of the land belongs to him. And let's be honest even though he fancies himself some kind of hunter gatherer, he couldn't survive without the neighborhood kebabs or chapatis he regularly discovers (“what a steal” right Paul?). He would be in greater trouble without the flat his parents bought him at a discount, (daylight robbery, right Paul?). Living in your hood makes him feel like he's in the wild already!

He thinks attending the neighborhood anti-gentrification meetings absolves him from his fuckeries. But everyone knows that he is just there to push his “Artisanal Nonviolent Revolution” manifesto to the residents. Whenever he stops by he can’t help but mention that three generations ago, his impoverished ancestors from Eastern Europe settled the neighborhood and "built it from scratch". Decades after they made their fortune and abandoned the city for the suburbs, he believes moving back to the neighborhood is simply a matter of "taking back what's his". He talks about this on page 7. The paragraph that starts with: “white, black, brown, green, organge [sic] all united…” you can guess the rest.   

A lot of folks are too kind to run him out, and some others even believe his presence is a sign that the neighborhood is coming up. 

Next time when you bump into him at his vegan bakesale and tell him: “Paul, gtfo before you attract more #ytppl like a swarm of locusts” he will cry: